career

  • I’m mostly satisfied with what I’ve accomplished so far, but
    • sometimes I feel like I’ve been brainwashed by tech hustle culture to want things that I didn’t want before. I have to step back and remind myself to consider why certain things even matter to me in the first place, and what my long-term goals in life are
  • I want to work on something interesting to me with positive impact on people
    • still figuring out what this is. most things are fine, some absolutely intolerable
    • i want to work somewhere mission-driven - feel like I’m working towards something that actually matters to people, where everyone actually cares about what they’re building
  • I gave a talk for a club this past quarter on my experience as an artist in tech, and how I balance both interests
    • had at least 3 people reach out to me and say they were inspired from that to take action and do something, whether that be start a club or make their first game, which was really cool to hear
    • i enjoy teaching, mentoring, helping people learn
  • can’t always listen to other people’s advice lol (thinking specifically on class recommendations)
    • everyone has different interests and values
    • listen to yourself, trust your gut

personal

  • I want to never stop expressing myself through art
  • never get complacent or stagnate; there’s always something to be done, something to be learned
  • my life is in my control! never live passively and let things slip me by, always do things with full intention; take full responsibility - this is something I’m constantly working on
  • I speak freely, deeply, to the people I consider dear; I say what I mean
  • Minimize regret
  • Do everything with care
  • do not fall for sunk-cost fallacy!!!

goal

  • be able to do anything that i want (lol)
    • have the qualifications such that the job i want is reasonably attainable at any time
      • essentially: be ready for anything at any moment - to have an opportunity and be unprepared for it would be the worst sin
    • sufficient visibility into things i do and accomplish such that it’s easy to ‘prove myself’ - building a track record

motivation

looking back

i would describe each year of my undergrad as:

  1. freshman: i know nothing so i will try everything - i made mistakes in high school i refuse to repeat, i want to change - meeting a lot more different kinds of people that broadened my worldview and interests
  2. sophomore: moving past intro classes, learning where i stand, realizing the importance of my hobbies, branching out
  3. junior: hard classes, exposure to lots of new learnings, doing things because i felt like they would be good for me, turbulent relations, shifting paradigms
  4. senior: experimenting with things that weren’t necessarily as productive or relevant but things i was genuinely interested in, making commitments, building, remembering the importance of visibility, desire to always actively improve my skills